Things I learned while travelling...

On Northwest Airlines, the movies could not get worse.

27 Dresses has almost no redeeming features.

Be Kind, Rewind has a few redeeming features.

Also, the service could not get much worse.

Throwing around eggs, chicken and boil in a bag rice does not make oyako-don.

You can't stretch your legs enough.

Children should be muzzled or part of checked luggage.

Your iPod batteries never last long enough.

Neither do laptops batteries.

Nor your Nintendo DS.

Old women love to speak Japanese to you.

Old women you speak Japanese to and help through American customs will give you cookies.

Seven hours is enough time to exhaust all the entertainment possibilities of Detroit airport seven times over.

Hamburgers are cheap and plentiful. The guy in front of you in the line has had dozens already today. Good luck getting around him no matter how wide the concourse.

There is no visible source from them, but there are hoboes inside the secure area.

US Customs is friendlier than their reputation. They have no visible sense of humour however. Don't even test this assertion.

Leaving an airport is the best part.

A three hour layover on the way back is more than enough to exhaust the entertainment possibilities of Detroit airport.

A half empty return flight is a more comfortable flight.

Anchorage is as good a place as any to stop for a hospital break.

Kung Fu Panda is a pretty funny movie.

Airline food varies widely, but Northwest can hit new lows everytime.

Demi Moore movies are shown on airlines because you can't leave the theatre. But you consider it. Every few minutes until the end credits.

And seven times in the ten minutes following the credits.

Taking your shoes off at security is not helping the situation.

If the water is truly a possible threat to security, why isn't the bin of confiscated liquids guarded?